Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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