my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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