My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
