im holly from the hills drunk
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize