my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
