The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
