DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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