its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
