I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize