i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
