My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
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Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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