We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
