Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
