I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Randomize
