this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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