In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
