Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
