does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
