My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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