he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
