i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
