rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
try to milk me bitch
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