Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
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