I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I need help removing her.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Randomize
