got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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