You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
