My friends, they love my intelligence
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
