people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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