i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
