The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
