I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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