i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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