I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
