She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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