i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
