what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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