I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
