Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize