I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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