In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
And then my night got REAL pukey
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Randomize
