he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize