everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
No...this little piggys going to the bar
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
