I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
