i don't plan on having that self control this summer
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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