Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize