I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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