The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
