He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
