You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
