You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
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that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
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I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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